Don MISC

Baseball is dead (Inner Monologue vol.1)

My Inner Monologue series is one that I express my thoughts and opinions about things that bother me particularly. This will be pointless to you if you come here expecting any intellectual writing, although I am indeed an intellectual. Inner Monologue will be random, informal, but probably relatable. I appreciate you.

First entry into this new series, and I feel the pressure. Let me set the stage, my lady decides she wants to take me out (chivalry is not dead). The place we go hasn’t reached out for a sponsorship/partnership so I refuse to give them free promo, but the place was packed with lots of drunk, white people. All ages, men and women, but it was mostly white.

Now here’s the problem with the white thing, white people love baseball. I’m white, and I’m an outlier because baseball fucking sucks. It’s the single worst sport to watch. And guess what, the damn NLCS was on, Brewers vs Dodgers. Mind you, 3 other college football games were on. I’m a fan of Dave Roberts, the Dodgers manager, so I consider myself a Dodgers fan. Now tell me this, not one person in this packed ass place was rooting for the Dodgers. I don’t get this. I feel like if I were to ask one of the drunk dudes what state Milwaukee was in, they would probably answer “yes”. That’s problem one.

Problem two is the Dodgers catcher dropped two balls in one inning, and the obscenities that came out of these peoples mouths toward this catcher took my breath away. “This guys sucks” “This dude is so bad” “Nice one catcher, haha catch is even in his position’s name” but the worst of them all is “I could do better”. Really Chad? You’re 6’1 and 120lbs soaking wet, probably spent your Sunday’s in church because your travel baseball team couldn’t get out of group play on Saturday, and you played on JV until your senior year. You mean to tell me that a dude who is starting for one of the top 4 teams in Major League Baseball is not as good as you? You mean to tell me that an organization is willing to pay somebody $10M instead of signing Chad from Ann Arbor who is sitting in Pizza House eating a deep dish pepperoni pizza while sipping on a Bud Light? It’s crazy to me.

Furthermore, another problem I would like to address are what I call “Twitter Analysts”. These are the people who 1. Do play-by-play commentary through tweets. 2. Try to do deep dive analysts on things 85% of their followers give no fucks about. Or 3. Use should’ve would’ve could’ve statements. We get it, you should be up in the box calling the game. You know what, most of the time these Twitter Analysts should be on the sideline wearing headsets calling the plays. Who would’ve thought throwing on third and one was such an idiotic play when you can “JUST RUN THE BALL”. Well here’s my rebuttal Twitter Analyst Mr. Just Run The Ball:

When it’s third and one on your own 37 yard line, most defenses will load the box to TAKE AWAY THE RUN. Key point there guy. If you have an I-formation with a split receiver, the defense will probably bring one corner in to cover the outside run, have a safety over the top for help with the corner on the lone receiver, and take the other safety out to turn you into a 5 front/ 4-4 looking set. This means 8 are in the box. Where can you run? Of course the defense thinks you are going to run. So if you play action pass it, as most times they do when they don’t run, you’re going to look for the tightend on a out route after the quarterback rolls out of the pocket to move the chains. When they convert, it’s a hell of a play call. When they don’t, you jump on twitter and give your two cents like it means a damn to anyone. Continue eating your boneless teriyaki wings and leave your dirty ass fingers off your phone.

With all that said, it’s one thing to run rampant on a player/coach/team, but criticizing is fine. But criticizing means to use critical thinking, which Twitter Analysts lack. Risky play calls that work are viewed as genius, and those that fail are viewed as horrendous choices.

All in all, I’m just sick and tired of all of this nonsense. I hope rather than being offended, you relate. If you’re offended, I probably hate you. Maybe.

TLDR; You’re not better than any athlete that you are watching on TV. More than a single tweet criticizing a play is preposterous.

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